


Repairing a shattered heart

by DefendersofMCUniverse (GeekMom13)



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Canonical Character Death, Healing, I'm also sorry Adam, I'm sorry Curtis, M/M, Minor Character Death, New Beginnings, Not Lance or Shiro, Past Adam/Shiro (Voltron), Past Allura/Lance (Voltron), Past Curtis/Shiro (Voltron), Season 8 compliant, there are two Deaths, very angsty
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-26
Updated: 2019-01-26
Packaged: 2019-10-16 07:26:41
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,740
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17545295
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GeekMom13/pseuds/DefendersofMCUniverse
Summary: Four years after he thought everyone was safe, Shiro is left to pick up the pieces-again.





	Repairing a shattered heart

**Author's Note:**

> Listen, there's a lot of angst here. _Please_ read the tags. 
> 
> This is for [Year of Shance](https://yearofshance.tumblr.com/) January prompt of "New beginnings"  
> Thanks KuroKosou

Shiro left the battlefield behind, but the battle wasn’t over. There were pockets of Zarkon and Haggar loyalists attacking the coalition. The garrison was supposed to be safe when he visited for his yearly lecture.

It wasn’t.

There were explosions and screaming and  _another_ ame of someone he loved added to the wall.

All of his teams- at least what was left of them- came to help him mourn, again. They left little by little as the months dragged on, only having so much time for someone else’s broken heart.

Shiro understood, he had been through enough funerals with everyone to realize that moving on was necessary.

He just wasn’t sure if he could do it again.

Keith was in and out- the universe was still uneasy and needing him- Shiro was happy to wave him off each time. Keith didn’t need to pick him up off the ground again- he had finally found peace in his role, grown from the angsty teen he first pulled into the garrison to a true leader.

Pidge and Matt had stayed close, but there was only so much middle of the night programming he could handle.

Hunk had been there with comfort food until Shiro thanked him and sent him away with a joke about his waistline- when in reality the food he cooked reminded him too much of the dinners with Curtis and Adam.

The only person he never managed to push away was Lance, probably because he didn’t  _want_ to.

Lance was the one person who knew what it was like. He had watched Allura walk into the battle for the final time too, knowing she probably wouldn’t come back.

He had seen it in Lance’s eyes- all these years later, comments about his Altean marking still made him tense.

He liked how Lace was just  _there._ No need to talk or try to offer Shiro some form of comfort that only made him want to scream.

He knew they were trying, so he never said anything, but he could sometimes see Lance off to the side shaking his head. Those days, Lance usually left out a pot of tea and busied himself with trying to revive the ‘garden’ that Shiro managed to kill after he planted it in their-no, his- yard.

Shiro knew that the planet Lance settled on had longer days, each one lasting about a week on Earth… but he often wondered how much longer he’d have Lance.

After almost 14 months, Lance had  _that look._ Shiro knew it had been coming for a while- the calls from home were getting closer together.

“Hey Shiro, I uh-”

Shiro put his hand up and put on a fake smile. “I know, Lance it’s time for you to go home, can’t keep babysitting me forever.”

The smile on Lance’s face faltered. “Well, no. I mean, I do have to go home... but-”

Shiro cut him off. “I get it.”

Lance laughed. “Actually, I was going to ask you to come. I mean… We need to harvest and extra hands are always useful. Not that you have to work. It’s just, I know that when I was constantly around the Lions-”

Shiro looked up at Lance, he was still rambling on- an old nervous habit he never kicked. “When?”

“Probably soon, harvest starts in a couple days.”

They spent the afternoon calling people to keep an eye on things for Shiro- it wasn’t hard to find volunteers, even knowing he’d be gone for a month or two. That night, Lance had found Shiro in his closet crying, gripping a shirt of Curtis’ that had made its way into his clothes.

“Shiro?”

“It’s not right, Lance.”

“I know.”

Shiro looked up- he had to have been crying for a while. “I guess you would know.”

Lance sat next to him, listening to him talk about Curtis, then Adam until their stomachs started to protest. Shiro was halfway through his sandwich when he looked up to Lance, realizing something he had not thought of in the year Lance had been staying in his house.

“Thank you.”

Lance waved it off. “Any of us would have done for you.”

“Yeah, but we didn’t do it for you with Allura. I’m sorry for that.”

Lance shrugged. “True, but I got to hear stories, y’know? I got to see her through everyone else’s eyes. We didn’t really have that many stories with Curtis to give that to you.”

“Still, if you ever need it-”

Lance shook his head. “I’ll always love her, but after so many years-” he looked off to the side and shrugged.

Shiro took the deflection for what it was, moving the conversation on for Lance’s sake. “So, I think I’ll be ready to head out soon. Kinkade is stopping by in a bit for the keys.”

Lance nodded. “I better make sure those plants are ready to survive those boys taking care of them…”

“I think it’s a lost cause, Lance. I mean, they couldn’t even survive me.”

Lance pursed his lips. “Maybe we should give them all to Colleen then…”

Shiro let out a deep laugh. “For their sake, you should. Plus, I’m sure she’d love more samples from your farm.”

They both went off to finish what they needed to do, a few people stopping by throughout the day to say goodbye. Shiro hopped in the shower before they left, tossing the keys at Lance for Ryan and James when they stopped in, just in case they couldn’t stay. He could hear the doorbell and hurried up- he wanted one last chance to say goodbye to them for the few months he’d be gone.

He paused when he heard shouting right before he went to shut off the water, quickly stepping on the mat and wrapping a towel around his waist and listening

_“Lance, he can’t just leave Curtis behind like this-”_

_“Colleen, he’s-”_

_“He’s going to get worse, here- he has memories.”_

_“Yeah, here he’s drowning in memories. He can’t heal.”_

_“But Curtis-”_

_“Is dead.”_

_“So was Shiro!”_

_“There’s no miracle this time, you know-”_

Shiro dropped the towel and hopped back in the shower- not ready to hear any more of their argument, hoping the water would drown it out. He could still hear the door slam a little while later.

He slowly got himself out of the shower and looking presentable by the time the doorbell rang again. Colleen was out in the garden, taking notes as she walked around, he glanced around to find Lance, but he was nowhere in sight.

Shiro shook it off as the doorbell rang again, probably James getting impatient waiting. As the door opened, he could hear Ryan grumbling about patience being a virtue that James obviously doesn’t possess.

Colleen came in halfway through their talk, hovering over them all as Ryan and James talked over the plans while Shiro was gone- checking a few times a week to make sure nothing broke and destroyed the house. She made a few sounds throughout that made Shiro tense and push on past before either of his friends could protest.

As he walked them to the door, with a long hug from each, he spotted a new ring. “And don’t go getting married until I can be there.”

James looked down, but not before Shiro saw the blush. “Sure thing, Captain.”

As soon as the door closed behind them- before they even got off the porch- Colleen started talking. “Shiro, are you sure you want to go?”

Shiro sighed. “Colleen, we’ve been over this.”

“But have you actually thought about what I said?”

“Yes, I have. Many times.”

“I just feel like leaving Curtis-”

“I’m not though,” Shiro walked over to their pictures, “what is left is memories. Memories that can be enjoyed no matter where I am.”

Colleen looked like she was going to say more but Shiro just turned away.

“I know you want what’s best for me, you’ve always been like another Mom to me. But this is what I think is best. Being in a new place where there’s no pity in everyone’s eyes. Where I’m not seeing my husband on propaganda commercials because they could only be bothered to remove his actual speaking parts after he died- leaving him in all the side shots!”

Colleen frowned at that. “I’m sure they would fix that.”

Shiro laughed. “No, they won’t. Maybe back when I was still their golden boy they would have done it. But now? They do the bare minimum.”

“I still think that two months-”

Shiro cut her off. “To me, it will be a little over a week. Just for the harvest. I’ve taken longer vacations before.”

“Fine. I will move the plants soon. They’re all outside so I can just come whenever, right?”

Shiro nodded, turning to offer her a hug. “It will fly by. I’ll be back before you know it.”

“I’ve heard that from you before. Heading off to another planet- be back soon!”

Shiro stiffened up.

“I’m sorry. I’m just worried about you.”

Shiro nodded and pulled her close. “Thank you. I promise I will see you soon.”

Lance came back shortly after she left, and they were on their way before the sun fully set. Shiro watched as the house faded into the landscaping.

“You’ll be back before you even realize it.”

“Is it bad that I don’t really feel bad?”

Lance looked over. “Nah. Feelings are never wrong. You feel how you feel.”

Shiro smiled. “I like that. I’ll have to remember it.”

The rest of the trip was quiet, both enjoying being in space again. When they landed, Lance was almost tackled by a few of his younger nieces and nephews. One handed him a flower for his hair right away, declaring they would match. When one of them noticed Shiro, they all rushed over to him.

A flower was soon tucked into Shiro’s hair too and they all followed the shout from the main farmhouse. Lance’s Mom stood in the doorway- apron and dress covered in flour as she called the family in for dinner.

She was making all the kids prove they hadn’t gotten their hands dirty in the small time they were outside before turning to Lance and Shiro, arms open for a hug. Lance was quick to react, relaxing into her arms and holding her close.

Once Lance let go, she held open her arms for Shiro. “Come on. You look like you need a mamá’s love.”

Shiro was happy to give her and hug and slouch over a little so she could walk him into the dining room, ordering people around so he could sit between her and Lance.

Throughout dinner, everyone updated Lance on the months he had been on earth, some of the younger ones showing off missing teeth before being reminded that it was rude to do with food in their mouths. Lance kept looking over and mouthing  _sorry_ to Shiro but he just waved it off- it reminded him of last few months on Altas- when things were safe enough for the crew to drag their families on and let them see the stars up close.

It was the only time that he felt like things were how he imagined- the peace of space and the look of joy on everyone’s faces, especially the younger ones. They never knew war, never had to feel the pain of battles.

He always wished for their innocence at those times. To look at the stars and see only hope… that was the dream that had been ripped away from him along with his arm.

Lance’s hand on his shoulder brought him out of it and he was surprised to see a concerned look on Lance’s face. He pointed to Shiro’s hand- where he had virtually destroyed the fork he was holding.

“I’m so sorry, I’ll replace it.”

Lance’s mom laughed. “No need, we keep plenty around since _someone_ saw some sculpture with bent forks and ruined my best silver.”

Lance coughed and blushed. “I was eight, Mamá. _Eight.”_

She smiled and reached over the table to ruffle his hair. “You were my baby then and you are my baby now, and I will tease you as such.”

Lance grumbled some more before going back to eating.

“I might yet have the pictures of that. I’ll look for it for you, Shiro.”

Lance groaned and a few of the older ones at the table started laughing along.

After dinner, Lance showed Shiro to his room. “I’m sorry it’s not as nice as yours back home- we don’t get many visitors. Everyone we have pretty much lives on this property. I’m the only one in the main house usually.”

Shiro ignored the implications behind that- it wasn’t like he had taken the time to visit much either. “It looks perfect.”

“We’ll be up early to start the harvest. You’re welcome to stay behind but mamá will probably put you to work in the kitchen if you do.”

Shiro chuckled. “I will probably join you out there. Heaven knows I could use a good distraction and a good workout.”

Lance smiled at that. “It’ll be nothing for you with that arm of yours. The rest of us have to count on our back to carry the bags. Night, Shiro.”

“Night, Lance, thanks again.”

Lance nodded and headed to the room at the end of the hall. “Wake me up if you need anything!”

Shiro got ready for bed quickly and was asleep quickly- it had been a few years since he had traveled in space and he was unused to the draining effect it could have. Settling down with Curtis had the end of his space days- a decision he didn’t regret at all. They might have fallen in love among the stars, but both accepted it wasn’t where they wanted the rest of their story to play out. Though, both thought they’d have more than four years.

Each morning, Lance would gently wake Shiro and they’d eat breakfast alone, meeting everyone out in the fields. The harvest was relatively easy- tedious work, but it helped Shiro to focus on something that wasn’t mourning for once.

Unfortunately, that meant realizing just how much he had fallen for Lance as his heart mended. He spent most of the time trying to sort out if his feelings were all because Lance had helped him fill in all the little cracks that losing Curtis had caused.

Each night, they would gather for a full family dinner- each night Shiro learned more about Lance. All the stories his family told just confused Shiro’s heart more and more. Lance would whine about them all embarrassing him, but Shiro treasured each new piece of Lance he got to see.

The last day of the harvest, he thought about going home. It made him remember coming home the first time to find Adam was dead- that had shattered his heart. Curtis had been there as the war died down and helped him piece it all together before asking him out.

He dropped his sack as the realization hit him- the only reason Lance and Curtis  _could_ help him heal is because they were already so embedded into his heart that they could easily piece it back together.

Lance rushed over and checked on Shiro, concern all over his face at Shiro abrupt movements.

“Shiro, are you okay? Holy crow I never should have let you be out here so many hours. Just because you’re in shape doesn’t mean-”

Shiro cut him off with a kiss, holding him gently so that Lance could back away if he wanted.

Lance  _definitely_ didn’t want to, but once his brain caught up, he stepped back. “Shiro?”

“Sorry, I should have asked I-”

“Why?”

Shiro rubbed the back of his neck. “I just realized why _you_ were the one who helped me the most without even trying.”

“Because I went through it?” Lance looked down, “I guess it’s bad that I liked that so much, huh?”

“No,” Shiro smirked, “a wise man once told me that feelings are never wrong. You feel how you feel.”

Lance blushed as he pulled Shiro into another kiss. Shiro wasn’t sure if he was ever going to fully heal from all the loss, but he had a new beginning here with Lance and he was going to enjoy every bit of it.

**Author's Note:**

> Colleen still has some weird habits and thoughts from the whole ordeal with Matt and Sam and then Katie.
> 
>  
> 
> You may notice this was originally posted under a different name (Shaladicks). This was my old pseud for VLD content, but I _did not_ own the Tumblr.  
> So, with a little work, I shifted it all over to [GeekMom13](https://geekmom13.tumblr.com/), but made this new pseud under my AO3.


End file.
